Wednesday, September 14, 2005

A week of some nevers

Went househunting the weekend.tried to compromise by hopefully getting an apartment( though i Never am happy about apartments) but its not to be it seems.liked one a bit too much dont know why..rare for me to like one as much and convinced mum and all that this one'd be great.yeah id hoped id get my own room finally but it seems it was not to be.i was pretty upset .

Pr was very upset kind the whole week in fact our whole gang of 3 n me was kinda fed up.those 3 are like sick and tired of the job and wondering what next in life.they have a great future the kids really.....its just thebegining ...mine s a different story.then there was this whole appraisal business.the secrecy in which its done...did u get it no ....umm yeah ....in process...suddenly people who never bother to speak trying to extract info.its kind of hard to hide it with friends.no one is happy abt kc i guess but the fact is the work sucks firstly and if only that habit of getting too personal is decreased its kind of good for everyone in the team but yeah all have their demons to fight and their ways.i write so much against kc's ways but i guess the fact is a guide is needed for kc to be better.. ...which is lacking and of course authority but the fact is my managers manager is a damned terrible complex story.
there is so much unease all around....people feeling the stuck up kind.new people already bored.Finally had my appr discussion at end and ..... all said and done i realised again where i lackonly one place .... confidence .Self confidence ive but the confidence of taking iniative is lacking and yeah the manager did make that clear but point given ...it was fair i felt in a way....it was made clear ... ur skills in process and mangement are highly appreciated so better build on that as you work.dont bother too much about technical(there are way too many for that) just get the basics fine.and some more discussions.it was already late so cut short.

When i thought about it all i wondered
who was true in there...me hmm yeah 75% but does kc think well really of me,or we are both trying to outdo diplomacy levels.I know i dislike things about kc and very vocal about them bet friends and the blog but what i like is one thing the ability to learn and listen ...only no good people to listen to are there.

aru was telling me she envies kc. i was ummmmmwhat is there to envy yeah a Sr manager at a young age than aru and me but look at life... no good.i probably dont dislike some people personally...just that in the work arena they simply are not fine.i was simply wondering .... me of all the work getting into marketing....not exactly but thats what im getting into indirectly.
Life always teaches me the same lesson.
Never say never...

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